376 A bit mixed up.

The Wilson Wisla on her way out of the harbour, heading towards Rotterdam. Don’t know what she’s carrying.

I value my weekends. I obviously have jobs to do around the house, but once these are done and we don’t have anything organised, then I have some time to do what I want. I could for example, join a golf club. I haven’t played for quite a long time and I am not very good, but I have enjoyed it. Quite recently, I had a go at sailing a model yacht. The Gosport model Yacht club is very active and has excellent facilities. I had indicated that I would be interested in buying a laser class model yacht. These cost about £600 brand new. 2nd hand boats are available, but can be difficult to find.

A radio amateur friend of mine indicated that he had a boat of the class that he was happy to loan to me with the possibility of sale. I said yes, and we were going set up the transfer – he lives on the Isle of Wight. Awkward, but definitely possible. But then he also said something else as well, about it taking up a lot of space. I hadn’t given that much thought. Now, that would definitely be a problem, And of course, I would need to use the boat. Perhaps not every weekend, but certainly regularly.

I think my problem really is commitment. I don’t want that. I don’t want to feel obliged to have to do something (golf, or model yachts). I know I don’t have to, but then I end up with something taking up space and not getting used, just going to waste. I had to explain all this to my friend, backing out of the arrangement. Luckily, he was very understanding. But then I realised that I was going to say that I am going to do something else, like for example go back to the library for research, or when the next opportunity arises, take a visit out to Rowner Church, and I need to spend some time working out what I am going to say about that.

It’s not that it feels like I’m fibbing about how I want to use my time, it’s more a case of giving the impression that I’m flighty and can’t make my mind up what I want to do. I felt very uncomfortable about that, but I think it is a more accurate reflection of me. Sometimes, I’m not very happy with myself. This morning was one of those times.

Published by Bill

I just want to write, but I prefer to stay away from controversial topics like politics. I am happy to confess that at the moment, I am writing for me. If you enjoy my writings, and I hope you do then that is all the better.

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